A PhD Is Not A Gold Standard

Two things today annoyed me (apart from finding I had bought mouldy carrots and caterpillar-enriched lettuce):

ONE

X: hey how's it going...what are you doing these days, a PhD?
Me: yep
X: just started?
Me: no, almost one year now...
X: oh really? have you secured your funding? how is your project?
Me: Yeah I have funding. Not quite sure about what I'm doing though, but I'll keep going... just doing my lit. review while I try to figure it out
X: Lit. review? Wait, are you doing your honours? Masters?
Me: PhD.
X: Why are you doing a lit. review? I never did a lit. review.
Me: It's a first year goal to finish a substantial piece of writing, so though I don't technically have to, I might as well write as a I read...
X: Pfft (that's ridiculous)?!


TWO

Me: I want MC to get back so he can help me. I don't know what I should do.
X: You really should try to think about it yourself.



BOTH of them involve someone else trying to tell me I don't know what I'm doing/that I'm inferior. What is with that? Am I not thinking enough? If I am not, how do I think more effectively? If I am thinking enough, does it mean I'm not good enough for a PhD? What does that even mean? Having a PhD is not a gold standard.

Everybody has an opinion, but few want to listen. To one person I'm too arrogant to ask for help, to another I'm not independent enough. Too hard to get, too easy. Too organised, too dreamy. Too energetic, too pessimistic. Too nothing.

I just want to talk with people I can trust and who won't try to 'win' at every opportunity. I don't want to talk to anyone else anymore. - leave me alone.

Also, I'm not going to let these comments get to me - I'm only going to listen to people I respect. You know I respect you, right? Maybe you don't. Sometimes I feel so incredibly defeated in every aspect I said I'd try to achieve. I just wanted to help you.

Technorati Tags : Cherrieland, Life, PhD